Dear Friends;
I hope that you’ll enjoy the following Parsha summary followed by a Dvar Torah;
” Parsha in a Nutshell “
G-d instructs the kohanim to exercise extreme care when they enter the Mishkan. On Yom Kippur, the Kohen Gadol brings unique offerings, including two identical goats that are designated by lottery. One is “for G-d” and is offered in the Temple, while the other is for “Azazel” in the desert. The Torah states the individual’s obligations on Yom Kippur: One must afflict oneself. We abstain from eating and drinking, anointing, wearing leather footwear, washing, and marital relations.
Consumption of blood is prohibited. The blood of slaughtered birds and beasts must be covered. The people are warned against engaging in the wicked practices that were common in Egypt. Marital relations are forbidden during a woman’s monthly cycle. List of forbidden relationships are outlined including homosexuality, bestiality. And a “child” sacrifice is prohibited.
” Dvar Torah “
Towards the end of Parashat Acharei Mot, the Torah talks about the forbidden relationships. It talks about prohibitions against sexual relationships with someone’s parents, stepparents, children, stepchildren, siblings, step-siblings, aunts, uncles, and the like. It even talks about the prohibition against marrying two sisters at the same time, since this will create a rivalry between the two sisters who are suppose to love each other, rather than to hate one another!
Towards the end of all these prohibitions, the Torah also condemns male homosexuality. It says the following for a man: ” Do not lie with a man as you would with a woman. It is an abomination.”
Although the Torah clearly condemns the act of homosexuality, but in today’s modern day society this prohibition is widely challenged. The people who are pro homosexuality come up with some strong and valid arguments. In favor of the homosexual, they say that he cannot control his sexual preference. They even come up with “genetics” proofs to explain his preference. They continue their argument by saying that sexual preference is subjective. It is inappropriate to label heterosexual behavior as proper and homosexual behavior as a perversion. Two people study a single piece of art. The beauty of the work inspires one. The other observer finds the work boring and mediocre. Is one correct and the other mistaken? Of course not! Each is entitled to his or her individual opinion. Why should the issue of sexual preference be treated differently? How can heterosexuality be regarded as more proper than homosexual preferences?
Well, how does our Torah answer these questions? How do our Chachamim comment on this issue? Since homosexuality is a very sensitive subject, many of the commentators try to avoid talking about it and I couldn’t find much commentaries on this topic. But still some of the medieval commentators such as Rambam, Ramban and Ibn Ezra do reveal their opinion.
Despite all of the modern notions about homosexuality, the Torah considers it unnatural, and therefore is an abomination. It is forbidden without exception!! Something which is not acceptable by G-d, should not be tolerated by us either! Accordingly, ALL of the Chachamim agree that the Torah clearly condemns the act and there is no way around it. But the question that still bothers me is how do the Chachamim explain the genetic issue?? What if a person is really genetically attracted to other men?? What if it’s not his fault and he was born like that? What if he really isn’t attracted to women at all?
Although most of the Chachamim disagree that homosexuality is a genetic or a medical issue, but for the argument’s sake, let’s assume that it is true. Accordingly, some of our medieval sages gave the following explanation to the genetic issue problem: They say that the answer to this dilemma lies in the Pasuk (verse) itself. The Torah says that “you shall not lie with another man”……… It does not say you should not desire another man!! The Torah is telling us that even if you desire another man, you should have control over your desires!! Just because you desire something, doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to have it!! For the same reason that if you really desire to be with another married woman but you need to have control over your desire since the Torah forbids it, so too, to be with another man, you also need to control yourself since it’s what Hashem demands from you. Remember that Hashem never gives us a commandment that is impossible to keep! Since it is written in the Torah in Parashat Nitzavim; ” The commandments that I give you today — it is not distance from you and not far from you. It is not in the heaven, nor across the sea…. Rather, it is very close to you; in your mouth and in your heart to perform it.” Yes, for some people it might be easier to keep a mitzvah, and for some it might be more difficult, but it’s never impossible!!
But the argument doesn’t end here. The homosexual person might say: ” But I’m really not attracted to women?! To me, that is a disgusting act!!” How can we answer this question now?
Well, when I was a kid, I had a friend who would never eat beef, chicken or fish. He would not even come close to them. He claimed that it made him feel nauseous. So every day and every night his Mom had to make him a separate dairy dish for lunch and for dinner. Until one day she was fed up, and she said to herself: ” I had enough! No more of this nonsense!!”. So from that day on she made sure to only make beef, chicken or fish for lunch and dinner everyday. The boy did not eat anything for a few days, but the Mom continued with her stubbornness. He cried, he moaned and he complained, but it was to no use. Until one day, he came to realize that for sure there is not going to be any food other than beef, chicken or fish any more, so he started to eat some of the dinner that the Mom prepared. At the beginning, he did feel nauseous, and he did throw up, but the Mom did not give up. Everyday he ate a little bit more and more and he felt less and less nauseous until eventually he began to like eating meat!
Same reasoning can be used for sexual relationships. If a person knows for sure that there is no alternative than sleeping with the opposite sex, then eventually he is going to like it. Only when there is a choice that he can compare with, only then he can show preference towards the forbidden relationship!! Some people can only drink sodas and not plain water. But if they would stop producing sodas forever, do you think that they are not going to drink water?
Yes my friends, Judaism is all about having control over our desires. Hashem wants us to overcome our desires and to be in full control. And this is what separates us from the other nations and makes us G-d’s favorite nation; His “Chosen People”! Hashem wants us to have control over what we eat, what we say, what we see, what we hear, and above all, to have control over our sexual desires. All these prohibitions in the Torah is for our own good and is for making us stronger people. Being free to do whatever you want, is not freedom; it means that you are not in control; your desires are controlling you!!
Remember that to desire something forbidden is not considered a sin, but to actually do the act of forbidden, it’s an abomination in the eyes of G-d and has it’s consequences. You never know, If only Adam and Eve could have just stared at those mouthwatering apples, and would have stopped there, we may all still be in “Gan Eden”, the Heaven on earth…….
Shabbat Shalom, Rosh Chodesh Tov & Regards;
Martin